Enjoy an Experience of the Elements of Success!

I have recently revised the audio experiences for the Elements of Success, making them easier to access via YouTube.  These audio/videos will enhance your experience of both The Balancing Act and SOS: Switch Off Stress. 

Here they are for your listening pleasure:

The Core: 

Go here if you're feeling anxious, lost, or bad about yourself so you can become more calm, steady and gain access to your brilliant intuition so you know how to improve your situation. 

Vision: 

Go here if you're feeling uninspired, pessimistic, or just crabby--and would like to shift to more hope and creativity.

Mission:

Go here if you're feeling stuck, lost and unmotivated,  and want to increase your energy and spark some action.

Interactions: 

Go here if you're feeling "off" emotionally, and want to reconnect to at the heart between yourself and those you love. 

Structure:

Go here if you feel stressed by money or organizational matters and would like to to feel more solid, steady, connected to the earth.

Synergy: 

Go here if you feel isolated, and want to feel reconnected, a part of something larger than yourself.

Announcing: SOS is now available in Print!

I am absolutely delighted to announce that SOS is now available in BOTH print and evaBook forms.  

It took me this past month to respond to the many requests for a print version of SOS. My major concern was to somehow maintain the evaBook's "6 second to 6 minute" timeframe for these 101 activities. 

I'm happy to report that I DID IT! (I created a companion SOS webpage that contains links to all SOS instructions/resources.) 

Get immediate relief from toxic stress! 

The choice is yours: print book + web resource ($11.69) or the evaBook ($8.99) Or, read more about SOS here!

The next blog will contain direct links for the updated versions of the Balancing Act "SOS" elemental audios--all of which are now available on YouTube! These will provide you with immediate relief from distress by directly experiencing the healing qualities of each one of the Elements of Success. 

Have a great day! - Sharon

Announcing the Free & Fast SOS Stress Quiz!

Find out which one of 6 Types of Stress hits you hardest. 

If you've yet not taken 2-3 minutes to complete the new SOS Quiz and gotten your free report, go here. If you have already completed the SOS quiz and have your report, you can read more about your primary kind of stress below--and you can also access an audio to get some immediate relief. 

Stress Type #1: CORE STRESS. You feel agitated, anxious, off-balance, uncomfortable in own skin; have low self-esteem, confidence, resilience; feel generally unhappy; take things too personally; feel unclear about life purpose, values, what’s important; don’t breathe deeply or sleep well; are too busy to relax or take breaks; run from one thing to the next; feel “empty” inside, not best self; have addictions can’t seem to stop (smoking, drinking, eating, etc.).

Reduce Type 1 Stress now by listening to Core audio on the TCI home page.  

Stress Type #2: VISION STRESS. You are bothered by mental looping, negative thinking, a hyper-active or critical mind; are doubtful and afraid too often; get stuck because over-analyze, over plan, over think; feel uncreative, uninspired, can’t generate good options; have a bad attitude, lack humor; don’t enjoy things or have as much fun these days; feel bored, unchallenged, uninteresting in new information/learning, not as smart as used to be.

Reduce Type 2 Stress now by listening to Vision audio on the TCI home page.  

Stress Type #3: MISSION STRESS. You procrastinate too much; have a hard time figuring out priorities or making choices; feel undisciplined, dissipated, unfocused, unmotivated; feel overwhelmed &/or burned out; lack direction, so are hesitant about moving into action and reluctant to take initiative; feel micro-managed and demoralized; avoid conflict; don’t feel energetic, ambitious, excited, proud of accomplishments.

Reduce Type 3 Stress now by listening to Mission audio on the TCI home page.  

Stress Type #4: INTERACTIONS STRESS: You feel emotionally “off” (either too emotional, emotionally flat, or somehow inappropriate in interactions); have key relationships that are unhealthy, unsupportive, draining, disrespectful or that keep you stuck; feel unappreciated, used, resentful, manipulated or exhausted from over-giving; would rather be isolated than involved now because don’t feel particularly pleasant, empathetic, compassionate or caring.

Reduce Type 4 stress now by listening to Interactions audio on TCI home page.  

Stress Type #5: STRUCTURE STRESS. You have difficulty managing or securing money, space, tools, &/or other physical resources you need; are impractical, unrealistic, unorganized; have trouble following directions and keeping things orderly; can’t be depended upon to complete tasks or meet deadlines; don’t take good care of physical health or possessions; have dysfunctional habits that undermine what you want to create; feel unsafe, insecure.

Reduce Type 5 Stress now by listening to Structure audio on the TCI home page.  

Stress Type #6: SYNERGY STRESS. You're having a run of bad luck; feel less effective and balanced overall; seem to have lost good judgment, discernment, a sense of perspective; don’t experience flow or ease, so things take too much time and effort; don’t feel particularly grateful or happy because others are better off; lack a sense of a connection to a Whole, Context, or the infrastructures that support your work, life and relationships.

Reduce Type 6 Stress now by listening to Synergy audio on TCI home page.  

And if want all 101 SOS stress reduction techniques to quickly reduce any kind of stress you're feeling, get SOS: Switch Off Stress or read more about it here. You can read this book on your Mac, iPad, PC, smart phone or tablet with this FREE Kindle Reader App: http://www.amazon.com/gp/feature.html/ref=dig_arl_box?ie=UTF8&docId=1000493771 …

Have a great day, 
Sharon Seivert

Loving Family and Friends: 

Tending & Befriending

This is a personal post that celebrates the fact the four Seivert Siblings all have birthdays within one month of each other (from 2/18 to 3/17). We are, from left to right: Dorothy, Irene, me, and Tom on vacation this past summer. 

This is the month in which we celebrate how lucky we are to have been born into the same family.  My siblings are truly wonderful people whom I admire greatly. Through the years we have helped each other relieve both major and minor stresses that come with the major and minor life crises we have shared. (We also have occasionally caused each other stress, but we won't go there now :-) 

Over the years, I feel we have taken very good care of each other--and I want to acknowledge how much I love them and how grateful I am to have them in my life. I also want to celebrate that, in addition to my great siblings, I am  blessed with many wonderful extended family members such as my parent's siblings (my aunts and uncles), and terrific cousins, in-laws, nieces & nephews. 

Actively caring for each other is a great SOS technique. In fact, researchers now indicate that Tending and Befriending is a highly effective stress reliever that is used throughout the human and animal kingdom. As it turns out, it is an excellent alternative to the much more well-known survival stress responses of "Fight or Flight".  In sharp contrast to the often  harmful harmful health effects of over-relying on Fight or Flight, Tending and Befriending has many positive, long-lasting health benefits (see below).

SOS #55: Tend and Befriend

(3-4 minutes)

One of the greatest stress relievers known to humanity is to care for and spend time with the people you love. Tending is when you do nurturing activities, such as caring for offspring or someone who is injured: protecting them, feeding them, ensuring their safety and wellbeing, and reducing their distress. Befriending is when you create and maintain friendships and family relationships, forming strong social networks that perform many of the same functions as tending.  Animal and human studies suggests that reproductive hormones may be at the core of this powerful alternate response to stress.

Here are some ways Tending works as an SOS activity. Let’s say you get home from work, and then put your concerns aside for a few moments as you listen attentively to your child’s excited stories from the day. (Poof! In just a couple minutes, whatever stressed you is forgotten.)  Befriending relieves your stress similarly--for example, when you reach out to be with good friends, call a sibling, and/or send notes to members of your personal, professional or social communities. It only takes a few minutes to pick up the phone, connect via Skype, FaceTime, or by texting or emailing a friend or family member. You can also drop by a favorite colleague’s desk or a neighbor’s home and arrange to meet for lunch, supper, coffee, or a healthy walk. (Again, poof—your stressors are replaced by the good feelings that come from tending and befriending.)

Tending and befriending can be used to help you build and expand strong communities—whether family (I just attended an uncle's birthday party via Skype), professional (I meet regularly with colleagues and clients via GHO), neighborhood, nation, or world. Tending and befriending is an SOS technique that reduces not just your own, but also many other peoples’ stress by preventing social isolation.  And social isolation, as we’re only now learning, is a major health hazard. indeed, scientists now argue that the health risks from loneliness are greater than those from smoking or obesity! 

In sharp contrast, a meta-analysis of 148 studies showed that people with strong social systems (those who tend & befriend) have a 50% greater likelihood of survival of their medical problems! This extraordinary mental and physical health phenomenon was consistent across age, gender, initial health status, pre-existing conditions and other factors. 

As it turns out, tending and befriending are great survival tools for you and all those you love.  So don't waste another minute -- reach out to tend and befriend someone! It will make your stress AND theirs go away (Poof!)

Learn more about SOS #55

Historically, the primary human stress response has been characterized, both physiologically and behaviorally, as "fight-or-flight."  But we do have other choices: we can also respond to distress by "Tending and Befriending". 

Tending involves nurturing activities designed to protect the self and offspring that promote safety and reduce distress. Befriending is the creation and maintenance of social networks that may aid in this process. The bio-behavioral mechanism that underlies the tend-and-befriend pattern draws on the attachment-caregiving system. Neuroendocrine evidence from animal and human studies suggests that oxytocin, in conjunction with reproductive hormones may be at its core. This previously unexplored stress regulatory system has many implications for curing much of the stress that is rampant around the world.

Unfortunately, many people are underdeveloped in our tending and befriending survival strategy. In fact, in the past three decades the percentage of individuals who consider themselves lonely in the US has risen from 20% to a whopping 40%!  The health risks from loneliness are significant: people who feel lonely are more likely to have an impaired immune system and untreated mental health issues (which in turn can cause the kinds of violent outbursts that turn into headline news). People who are socially isolated recover more slowly from surgery, and have greater risks of inflammation, heart disease, and premature death. 

Note: Social isolation is reduced only by real human contact. No matter how many Facebook “friends”, Linked In connections, or Twitter followers you have, you can suffer from social isolation. Tending and Befriending is a low-tech SOS strategy AND an incredibly powerful one. It shows that, in very real ways, when you reach out and welcome someone into your life, your social circle, or your neighborhood, you are helping to heal yourself, them, and the world.

COMING SOON:

I will be sending you a birthday gift sometime in my birthday month--a new audio meditation  that was suggested to me (actually demanded of me) by an enthusiastic client.  Consider it a thank you to my entire community of extended family, friends, clients, colleagues, and readers for the many ways you've tended and befriended me over the years.

GOOD LUCK!!

If you want to tend to those you love by providing them some stress-relief, go here to purchase SOS: Switch Off Stress (only $8.99 for this 258-page-equivalent "evaBook"). You can also read more about the value SOS can offer you and all those you love.

You may also want to give people you care about The Balancing Act, which is the foundational work upon which SOS is built.  Learn all about TBA here. (It's available in both print and eBook versions.)

And here's a link for a Free Kindle App so you can read SOS or TBA on any PC, MAC, tablet, or smart phone.

Relieve Stress between you & those you love...

Here is a quick technique to help you relieve any minor or major stress between you and your Valentine (or anyone whose relationship is special to you--not just your spouse or significant other, but also important friends, colleagues, children, siblings, parents, etc.) 

This 4-6 minute activity is from the Interactions section of SOS: Switch Off Stress.  Let's say that you and this person have some tension between you that you'd like to resolve. The below exercise while help you transform your own emotions so you come to the next interaction with less emotional baggage.

How to Do SOS #53

Transform Negative Emotions

Many emotions we consider “negative” can actually teach us important things about ourselves. This technique shows you how to make negative emotions less overwhelming by  treat them as if they were simply raw energy.  You know from experiencing and observing your own emotions how quickly they can change; often coming and going naturally, like waves on the ocean.  What you can do with this SOS tool is to befriend the full range of your emotions so they can help you learn about yourself and improve your cherished relationships.

I recommend the Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) as a way to learn from and release “bad” feelings because it is so simple, fast and portable and simple. EFT will quickly mutate any fear, anger, anxiety, jealousy that's hampering your important relationships. 

There are many schools of thought about how to do EFT; I urge you to adopt the instructions that most appeal to you.  Basically, the EFT process involves tapping lightly on a series of meridian points while making statements to release whatever negativity you’re feeling. To start, you will do a few rounds of statements that serve to first admit and surface, then release all the negativity you’re experiencing. ("I am so angry about what s/he said."  "I'm going to ignore him/her and see how THAT feels!") The second phase of EFT is to complete a few rounds that replace those snarky statements with neutral or more positive declarations. ("I have always admired him/her, and want to do my part to make it right between us again."  "I allow for the possibility that I may have contributed to these bad feelings between us.")

The common points for tapping are: outside edge of hands, top of head, inner eyebrow, side of eye, below eyes, under nose, under mouth, collar bone, under arm.  You will see that there are many variations of EFT; simply choose what makes the most sense for you.

• A fun introduction to EFT points (4 minutes)
• Stress and anxiety (4 minutes)
• Stress and anxiety #2 (5-6 minutes)
• And a special tapping just for Valentine's Day: Love Magnet!

(Note: All emotional release techniques need to be done where you will not be disturbed, nor will you disturb others. Most cultures are uncomfortable with emotional release, so be certain other people won’t try to “rescue” you from your healthy transformation of emotions.)

What SOS #55 Can Do for You

EFT is a self-help combination of acupressure and cognitive behavior therapies. This handy tool has gathered a great deal of attention in the last decade, and is currently undergoing considerable research in many countries around the word.  EFT works in part by sending physical and verbal soothing signals to your brain, which in turn dramatically lowers cortisol—by as much as 25% in one study!

And the good results are mounting. For example, there is a 5-year study at John Hopkins where researchers are using EFT for returning soldiers with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). At the three-year mark, it reported a staggering 63% reduction in symptoms. EFT has also been used successfully with victims in war zones, natural disasters, violent crimes, and mass shootings. So…just think of what it could do to reduce the discomfort you're feeling between you and your Valentine!

Here are additional EFT videos and websites for you to explore: Try it on Everything; www.TappingSolution.com; www.EFTUniverse.com; Tap for Health blog. 

GOOD LUCK!!!

If you want to help your Valentine(s) enjoy some stress-relief, go here to purchase SOS: Switch Off Stress (only $8.99 for this 258-page-equivalent "evaBook")--or click here if you want to read more about what SOS can do for you and all those you love.

And here's a Free Kindle App so you can read SOS on any PC, MAC, tablet, or smart phone.

Second SOS Technique to Stop Stress-Eating 

The next really fast technique from SOS: Switch Off Stress that can help you with the common problem of stress-eating is #39: Activate Your Energy (The 20-Second Rule). 

In fact, this is a very useful and highly versatile technique for stoping any bad habit OR forming any good new one. So...whether it's not eating that coffee cake at your desk--or getting up from that same desk for a few minutes to take a break, stretch, and clear your mind, SOS #39 could be a big help to you.

How to Do SOS #39

Activate Your Energy

(The 20-Second Rule)

If you’re having a hard time switching off stress-eating, you can Activate your Energy so it moves you more decisively in your chosen direction.

Research has found that if you reduce the time it takes to initiate a task, you greatly improve your odds of both starting that task and staying with it until you form a new habit.  The 20-second rule launches you into action so you don't get stalled figuring out what to do, weighing your options, and making a decision. This tool translates into a very simple math equation:

• CONSTRUCT a 20-second-plus barrier in front of a bad habit you want to stop (e.g., eating that chocolate donut); and/or,
• REMOVE any time barriers between you and the new habit you want to establish (e.g., having a delicious apple in a bowl on your desk).

The key is that the time from thought to action must be less than 20 seconds.

Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, the author of the classic book Flow, called this “activation energy”, i.e., the vital initial spark you need to overcome inertia and launch a positive habit. The 20-second rule sets up a new path of least resistance to a preferred habit.  It bypasses your need to always rely on grit, stamina or will-power to achieve your goal. ("I won't eat that cookie!.... I won't eat that cookie!.... I won't...oh, what the heck, it's just one cookie!") 

And, because it goes a long way to taking resistance and feelings of deprivation out of the equation, this 20-second SOS tactic can take you a long way toward reducing stress-eating! Here are some specific suggestions for putting the Activation Energy SOS technique to work for you: 

• Make a 15-second list of groceries to buy so you're well stocked on nutritious options. 
• Xerox a tasty recipe so you bring necessary ingredients home.
• Grab something healthy to eat before going to the grocery store; that way you won't be hungry (which makes you less likely to over-shop &/or grab too-tempting foods). 
• As soon as you enter the grocery store, use the 20-second rule to direct your feet first to aisles with fresh foods, veggies, fruits; you'll then pass the snacks with a full basket.  
• Once home, put healthier food choices in the front of your refrigerator and store less nutritious foods someplace they will take you more than 20 seconds to retrieve when the impulse to stress-eat next hits you. 
• And, last but not least, you can double up on your SOS tools to stop stress eating by using the Emergency Breath (see prior blog) or another Core breathing technique. This will help you stay your hand when you notice it's inching toward that bag of chips.

Have some fun; get creative. Activate your Energy to blast through all obstacles in the way of your resolution and goals. Don't rely on will power to see you through. Instead, use the 20-second rule to make much easier work of developing healthy, stress-free eating habits. 

What SOS #39 Can Do for You

There’s almost no limit to how you can use the 20-second rule to change your life for the better. For example, if you want to stop watching so much TV, hide your clicker and put some good books where it used to be.  Make sure that wherever you hide the clicker will take more than 20 seconds (and some physical labor) before you’d be able to put your hands on it.  That way you'll be making an affirmative decision that the upcoming show is worth all this extra effort.

As another example: if you want to exercise first thing in the morning, put your clothes in the path you take between your bed and the front door. If that doesn’t work (and your mate doesn’t object), sleep in them until your new morning exercise habit is firmly in place! You may also want to place your alarm clock so it is waaaaay across the room. That way you’ll be on you’re feet and moving before you even know it.

You can read more about activation energy in the classic book Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi and in The Happiness Advantage by Shawn Anchor.  You may also want to view Csikszentmihalyi’s TedTalk “Flow, the secret to Happiness” at www.ted.com.

GOOD LUCK!!!

PS. Go here if you want to purchase SOS: Switch Off Stress (only $8.99 for this 258-page-equivalent "evaBook")--or click here if you want to read more about what SOS can do for you.

And here's a Free Kindle App so you can read SOS on any PC, MAC, tablet, or smart phone.